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Why I Cried When Someone Stole My Snacks

11/14/2017

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When my husband and I first started dating, I was deep in the midst of my food, exercise and body perfectionism. I was always dieting and only ate certain foods, except for a few treats I would allow myself at very specific times during the week (like after a long workout or something similar). Other than those select treats, I was eating “perfectly”, so I took them very seriously and any attempt by Westin to snag a bite or be shared with was met with bared teeth and snappy refusals.
 
Looking back, I think of the exchanges as comical: a grown woman snatching candy out of her boyfriend’s hand with a shriek. And I’ll admit that I do the same thing from time to time, but now it’s for fun because there’s not emotion attached to the food.
 
The main issue with my previous behavior is that when someone would try to take my precious snacks, I would literally pout about it. It would hurt in my chest. I had allotted a certain number of calories or had done extra squats to make this treat possible and then someone else stole that from me. Not only was I depriving myself so much that I wanted to cry most days, but I was also living with the idea that this treat was the most important thing I’d eat…until the next one (but who knows how long I’d have to diet before that was possible).  
 
I was stingy with my food because:
1) I was self-centered and thought I had “earned it”
2) I was restricted to the max
 
Being self-centered and entitled is another topic by itself, today I want to talk about how restriction leads to scarcity and how we can get out of it.
 
When we talk about scarcity in the context of diet culture, it’s not that we think food is in short supply, it’s that we’ve trained ourselves to see certain foods as “high value” because of restriction. Instead of seeing these foods as any other food that we can eat and moderate, they become VIP, top of the list, Craving’s Most Wanted foods. We label foods this way because we know we’re “not suppose” to have them and we see them as finite. We get scared of missed opportunities to eat these foods, which makes us feel like we absolutely must overindulge when we do get to have them.
 
When we’re trapped in the binge and restrict cycle, we automatically attach scarcity emotions to food because we never know the next time we’ll have the opportunity to eat “off limits” foods. I used to binge on a pint of ice cream and get sad about it because not only did I break a dieting “streak”, but I also didn’t know when I’d allow myself to eat ice cream again.
 
The hardest time of the year for dieters is the holidays because tis the season to bake pies, Christmas cookies and have parties with food and drinks. Traditional diets tell us that all of this is bad and dangerous and I’m sure you can read many articles online about how to “avoid temptation” during the holiday season. In fact, I know you can because I used to read them all and pretty much always failed at following protocol which led to bigger binge/restrict and shame cycles.
Being stuck in scarcity makes us feel we have no other choice than to eat the food presented to us because the moment may not last and we’ll miss out.
 
To combat scarcity, we need to cultivate an abundance mindset. Outside the context of food, abundance is knowing there’s enough to go around whether it’s money, success, opportunity, creativity, love, etc. When it comes to diet culture and food, it’s realizing that we do have options. Abundance allows us to rid ourselves of limiting beliefs. An abundant mindset chooses foods out of thoughtfulness rather than impulse.
 
Practicing abundance means we eat food because it’s enjoyable instead of out of fear of missing out. It allows us to eat until we’re satisfied because we know we can always eat more when we’re hungry, instead of stuffing our faces because we may never eat the same meal ever again.
 
The holidays are a tricky time for this because certain foods and parties only happen this time of year, but that’s the scarcity talking. The reality is we have access to these foods anytime we want. You might say there isn’t the same feeling of pumpkin pie in April, which I would agree with. But we need to start seeing food as an addition to that feeling, rather than the feeling itself.      
 
Questions to ask when feeling pulled toward food at an event or gathering is, “Am I eating this for fear of missing out?”, “Is this what I actually want to eat?”.
 
Honestly, as with all things moderation/intuitive eating, the best way to avoid fueling our binge and restriction, is through practice and patience. It can feel like we’re sabotaging ourselves at first, like “Why do I need to question my motives?” and “Can’t I just enjoy food on Thanksgiving?”. I’m not telling you to question yourself as a means of turning down food, instead it’s a means of learning about yourself and what motivates you to eat.
 
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Please comment with any questions or responses to this blog, I’d love to hear your take on eating during the holidays!
 
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How to Stop Overindulgence Food Guilt

10/31/2017

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The holidays can be an iffy time for us and our diets/health.
 
There are those people who will stress the entire holiday season about all the sweets and extra food at every social gathering. They spend so much time preparing and ensuring they eat only certain foods that the holidays cause them a lot of stress and anxiety. Parties and gatherings quickly throw a wrench at what they’re exposed to and what they’re forced to resist. And when they’re unable to resist (which is often the case), guilt and self-loathing ensues.
 
Then there will be others who throw any idea of health and fitness out the window. They feel like it’s a special time of the year and they’re gonna enjoy it to the fullest (#yolo). And they feel like maybe they’ve already been unfaithful to their diet/exercise for a while, so why try to keep it up at this point? These people might not have regret in the moment like the resisters, but once the New Year comes around and their gym membership starts, they’re wishing they had a couple fewer slices of pumpkin pie.  
 
I’ve been in both of these BS diet positions. I spent years watching, counting and measuring my food and I dreaded holiday parties. It felt like so much work to restrain myself from the food and booze that I didn’t even want to go, it caused me too much stress.  When I did give in, I would feel terribly guilty about all of it and restrict even further the next day or week to make up for what I ate that was “off plan”.
 
I’ve also spent holidays not caring about what happened, what I ate or drank and how much I exercised. I justified it by saying that I had been on track all summer, I needed a break and what better time than the holiday season. But I’d usually go overboard, gain some weight, feel bloated 24/7 and hate myself when my New Year’s Resolution started. Getting back into the groove was harder than ever and I felt I needed to hit the diet and exercise gig extra hard to reverse the damage I’d caused from October 31st to January 1st.
 
With today being Halloween and the beginning of the holiday season, I wanted to remind you that what you eat today doesn’t need to affect what you eat tomorrow. Sure, today might involve a good bit of candy and chocolate, but an overindulgence one day doesn’t justify restriction the next.
 

I’ve come to think of binging and restricting as a pendulum because the bob (the weight on a pendulum) is constantly in motion from one extreme to the next. The swings of a pendulum represent the constant back and forth of binging and restriction. If we’re not doing one, we’re doing the other as compensation, but neither can be sustained for too long before we’ve overdone it and swing to the opposite extreme. Moderation is finding that equilibrium space in the middle, where we’re neither overindulging or restricting.
 
There will be times where we indulge, but it’s important to realize that it happens and resist the urge to restrict the next time we eat because that only causes the pendulum to keep swinging. The goal is to end the binge and restrict cycle, so even if a little binging happens, we need to stay balanced at our next meal.
All of this takes time and practice and we won’t get it right every time we sit down to eat.
 
A couple months ago at a concert, we bought some delicious mini donuts from a stand. They we’re delicious (which I already said, but the point remains), and I ate 5 or 6. Eating a few mini donuts could have caused me to restrict the next morning for breakfast because I felt guilty, however I was craving some coffee cake from our local coffee shop. Instead of telling myself I couldn’t have any because I was a “bad girl” last night, I went and got the coffee cake and ate it happily with my usual breakfast. None of this is perfect, but perfection isn’t the point! Both of these scenarios left me satisfied with my food choices.
 
The shift here is away from overindulgence guilt and toward acceptance of the situation. As I said, the goal isn’t perfection, it’s about slowing down that pendulum and finding a happy medium. When we look at our meals as individual events and actions, we can start to clear the stress of what we ate previously or what we’ll eat later and just focus on what our bodies need right now to be nourished and satisfied.  
 
Not stressing about food and feeling happy with our food choices is the ultimate goal.  
 
Some actionable things you can do tonight and tomorrow to help prevent or lessen food guilt is 1) remind yourself that you don’t need to feel guilty for anything you eat. This is a mindset shift and part of making that happen is changing the way we talk to ourselves. 2) You’re not required to “make up” for what you eat by dieting or exercising. If you planned on going to the gym the day after Halloween, that’s great, but please don’t go because you feel bad about eating candy. And even though you ate candy (perhaps you’re nomming right now), you still need to eat tomorrow, you’re body still needs and deserves sustenance and nourishment.
 
Remember:
You are NOT what you eat.
You are worthy of love and food and good things.

 
Stay with me for the month of November because it’s #MerryModeration month, wherein I will be discussing moderation how-to’s and how it apply moderation even during the Holidays.
 
 
Then join me in December, for a 21 day Countdown to Christmas Consistency Challenge starting December 1st ! Yay! So many good things coming up! 
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4 Reasons to Eat More Protein at Breakfast

10/10/2017

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One thing I see with my online training clients (and friends and family) is a lack of protein in their daily food intake. My clients come to me complaining of hunger and cravings, and their not sure how to get rid of those while reaching their goals. They want to eat more food, but fear that will cause them to gain weight, but they’re tired of being hungry (understandably so!).
 
If that’s your problem, you’re in luck because the solution isn’t to just tough it out and starve, but rather eat more protein, especially in the AM. Some people prefer to skip breakfast, and I’m not here to say it’s the most important meal of the day, but loading up on protein at your first meal of the day (whenever that is) is important. I’ll be referring to this meal as breakfast because the majority of us eat a regular breakfast.   
 
(If you’re looking for some recipes to start your day off with extra protein, I’ll be sending three high protein breakfast recipes to my email list on Thursday morning, you can add your name here to get those.)
 
If you’re not sure the benefit of eating protein for breakfast, here are four reasons to load up:
 
1) Kickstart the Metabolism
Starting the day off with protein, in place of a high carb breakfast, will help kickstart your metabolism for the day because of its thermic effect. Protein is made up of amino acids, which take longer to breakdown than either carbohydrates or fats, so our metabolism has to work harder to retrieve the energy from it. This automatically puts our metabolism on high to fuel our bodies for the day.
 
2) Feel Full for Longer
Protein is considered the “sustainable” macronutrient; gastric emptying takes longer when our bellies are full of protein because of protein’s slow digestion time.  Carbohydrates are a faster digesting macronutrient, so starting the day off with lots of carbs will only lead to hunger and cravings after an hour or two. Eat protein in the morning and ward off snacking your way to lunchtime.
 
3) Stop Craving Sweets
I’m not gonna say that eating more protein will completely eliminate cravings for sweets (I know I still get them), but one of protein’s main jobs in our body is insulin regulation. One of the reasons we crave sweets is from low insulin levels. Our bodies natural response to low insulin is sugar carvings because sugar digests fast and spikes our insulin level. By eating more protein, we start our day off with a stable insulin level that isn’t going to crash and spike before our next meal, this will keep us from reaching for a snickers cause we’re being “a diva” (insert feminist remark here).
 
4) Sharper Mental Focus
The amino acids that make up protein not only provide the building blocks of our muscles and connective tissues, they’re also what keep our brains healthy. Our neurotransmitters are made up of amino acids and when we eat a high protein breakfast, our brains are able to use those amino acids for better mental clarity and focus.
 
I’m not sure you need more reasons that than that to eat more protein for breakfast, but if you do, you can also count protein’s muscle building effect. The more muscle mass we have in relation to fat mass, the higher our metabolic rate and the easier it is to stay lean.
 
Protein is a dense food source, so don’t be surprised if you feel full faster with a high protein breakfast, another benefit, if you’re tracking calories.
 
Stay tuned for three breakfast recipes getting sent out in an email on Thursday morning!
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